Monday, August 21, 2017


Salam & hai.

Jadi sekarang tengah menunggu keputusan hasil interview. Sudah beberapa kali turun naik KL-Terengganu (nasib baik ayah tak bising sangat) semata-mata untuk pergi interview. Fuh. Menyesal pula dulu tak hantar resume awal-awal. Tapi itulah, waktu tu tengah sibuk dengan advokasi, (dan juga tak nak ganggu study week & deadlines yang banyaaaakk). I'm the one that need to focus on one particular things at the moment. Tak boleh campur-campur nanti pening.

Sedih la juga bila hantar emails banyak-banyak tapi tak semua firma pun yang bagi balasan. Kalau ada pun balas yang firma mereka sudah penuh bagi pelatih dalam kamar (chambering/pupil). Banyak minta di middle size firm je, memang tumpukan pada tu. Sedih pula bila mohon di firma yang betul-betul nak, tapi kuota dah penuh. :( Tak ada rezeki nak buat macam mana.

Ayah be like; "Chambering ni boleh buat dekat mana-mana firma guaman?"

Me: "Ya."

Ayah: "Kalau macam tu minta kat Terengganu jelah"

Nooooo. Ayah tidak memahami...... Hahahahaha. Anak ayah ni tengah buat perancangan karier jangka masa panjang, kalau chambering dekat Terengganu, bukan nak cakaplah, tapi macam terbantut sikit. Di sini firma guaman bayar gaji untuk pelatih dalam kamar ada yang sampai RM500, yes believe me, I did the survey lol. Kalau dapat retain pun gaji ciput je, macam mana nak sara umi dan ayah huhu.

Jadi...cakap pasal interview, ada nak cerita sikit.

Soalan pelik interview

Ingatkan pada alaf 21 ni, rakyat Malaysia sudah berfikiran terbuka, apatah lagi kalau dalam bidang profesional seperti bidang guaman ni kan. Sebab tiba-tiba di salah satu firma guaman, orang yang menginterview tu ada bertanya:

"If there is a client or someone who is a non-muslim guy wants to shake hands with you, would you do it?"

"What if we're in an important meetings, and the prayer times will be at end, would you still stick on the meeting till the end?"

Mind you, these questions were asked by an interviewer who is a malay muslim too. I mean like, come on! Ask me something that law related, or anything related to the firm's field. Even the chinese interviewer didn't asked me questions that so out of topic like that.

Maybe because I'm the one who wears the veil. (tudung). If I looked like someone who really so conservative in your eyes, I wouldn't send a resume to your firm, I will send a resume to a firm whom had the all muslim's legal associates.

And yeah, I think I wouldn't get to chamber at this firm. Lol.

The other interview at another legal firm was fine, but I don't think it was good enough because it was very brief. The partners seems like very busy on that day.

So yeah while waiting for the results, I'm still sending my resumes to other potential firms. I'm so bored doing nothing at home!

Saturday, August 19, 2017


Halsey - Sorry

I've missed your calls for months it seems
Don't realize how mean I can be
'Cause I can sometimes treat the people
That I love like jewelry

'Cause I can change my mind each day
I didn't mean to try you on
But I still know your birthday
And your mother's favorite song

So I'm sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry that I can't believe
That anybody ever really
Starts to fall in love with me

Sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry I could be so blind
Didn't mean to leave you
And all of the things  that we had behind

I run away when things are good
And never really understood
The way you laid your eyes on me
In ways that no one ever could

And so it seems I broke your heart
My ignorance has struck again
I failed to see it from the start
And tore you open 'til the end

And I'm sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry that I can't believe
That anybody ever really
Starts to fall in love with me

Sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry I could be so blind
Didn't mean to leave you
And all of the things  that we had behind

And someone will love you
Someone will love you
Someone will love you
But someone isn't me
Someone will love you
Someone will love you
But someone isn't me

Saturday, August 12, 2017

Serious Stuff

Salam & Hi :)

I used to write and blog since I was thirteen years old. And mostly I wrote about psychological stuff (online psychology test), family, school, motivational cliche topics (bahahaha), random topics and sometimes write the reviews of movies and books. My first blog was in the wordpress website, and then I moved to blogdrive, and after that tadaaaa, in I can't remember why I did not stick to one type of blogging website back then, but maybe because of trends.

When I was fifteen, I used to have a good conversation with this one senior that I respected. Once, we shared a several blog links of Malaysian students who wrote a good and serious topics about current issues and religion. And then I asked her, "Kak, why don't you try to write a blog too?"

Of course at that time I did not tell her that I have a blog (because my blog full of childish stuff). And then she replied, "I don't think I have a good things to write and share to the people."

Me: "Oh, but you can start with just sharing about your life and stuff like that."

And after that I don't really remembered what exactly that she said, but basically this; she said that if she wants to write, she does not want to write about just her life, she wants to write about serious stuff like current issues, religion etc. And yes, it hits me paaapp like that in my heart hehe.

Of course, I was a teenager back then. And now a bit matured (ehem), I still cannot write a serious topics in my blog without it being end up in a draft section. It's not that I can't, I just realized that I don't want to. (At least now.. I think)... after my contract with gov ended haha

Friends who personally know me, knows that I like to discuss about philosophy, current issues, criticized this and that, and a strong opinionated person (they called me stubborn, actually). Sometimes I wish I have a pen and paper like Rita Skeeter (in Harry Potter) that will write everything that popping out of my mouth, so it save myself from writing it down again (yeah, I'm that lazy).

But maybe it just like, blogging for me, at this moment, more to a reflect of chronological part of my life. I mean, it's more like a recorded life that I wrote down at the moment, what I think, rambled about etc. So that I will read at the old entries and feel like "Wow, what a naive teenager I've been back then" or "Why I write this stupid stuff?" or "Is this really me who write this?"

That's why in my bio, I wrote that this is a personal blog.

And yes, sometimes I wish I can publish all of those without a doubt, and without afraid of the reaction or feedback from other people. (Yeah, my opinion is THAT scandalous).

#selfclaim #booo

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Trip ke Pulau Perhentian


4 hingga 6 Mac 2016: Trip ke Pulau Perhentian bersama 6 Sekawan :). Entri ni dah lama terperuk dalam draft, baru nak publish :D

Kami pergi dengan pakej #PerhentianKravers yang merangkumi penginapan 3 hari 2 malam, tiket bot pergi-balik dari jeti ke Pulau Perhentian, snorkeling ke enam check point (dengan sewa peralatannya sekali), sarapan + makan tengah hari + barbeque untuk sehari. Semuanya dalam RM280. Boleh check instagram mereka @perhentiankravers untuk lihat pelbagai pakej lain yang disediakan.

Perjalanan pergi-balik ke Pulau Perhentian tidak termasuk sekali dengan pakej. Kebetulan waktu tu AirAsia tiket ke Kota Bharu promosi RM39 sahaja, rezeki kami. Lepas tu daripada airport KB naik bas menuju ke perhentian bas KB. Dari sana kami transit naik bas lain menuju ke Jerteh, Terengganu. Lupa sudah berapa tambang bas, tapi kalau tak silap tak lebih daripada RM10 pun untuk kedua-dua perjalanan bas tersebut.

Kami menginap memang betul-betul di Pulau Perhentian long-beach (area kampung nelayan) tu. Kami menginap di Aura Bay. Jadi malam-malam bolehlah pergi main air di gigi pantai dan pusing keliling pulau tu. Hari pertama aktiviti bebas, (bergambar, mandi pantai, makan-makan, sembang-sembang etc).

Ada satu restoran ni masya-Allah sedap sangat makanan dia, dan memanglah harga makanan ke, barangan ke, kat atas pulau ni memang berganda sikit daripada harga normal, tapi pergi makan kat restoran ni memang berbaloi. Nama restoran tu Ewan Kafe/Cafe macam tulah, menyesal baru merasa makan pada hari last nak balik haha.

Hari kedua pergi snorkeling ke enam check point, yang sekali dengan pakej. Habis snorkeling pergi makan tengah hari di Short Beach. Malam tu makan makanan ber-barbeque (yang include dalam pakej). Lepas tu pergi jalan-jalan pusing pulau pergi area belakang, di mana terdapat mini bar bagi non-muslim yang nak minum-minum dan upacara unggun api (waktu kami pergi tu lah).

Hari ketiga, sebelum subuh lagi bangun pergi hiking ke area windmill. Solat subuh dekat atas sana. Dan tengok matahari terbit dari sana. Memukau.

Pukul 12 tengah hari kami naik bot untuk ke jeti jerteh. Balik ke TBS malamnya dengan menaiki bas. Esokannya ada kelas haha. Pergi kelas dengan muka sunburned.

Monday, July 3, 2017

'Me-time' Syndrome

Currently reading this book, and Evangeline Canterbury's character was like the portrayal of myself, but mine is extended not just in relationships, but also towards family and friends too. Reserved.


“I know you’re busy, darling. But surely nobody is too busy for love.”

“It’s not that. I may be…I may be incapable of a real relationship.”

“That’s ridiculous.” Zelda huffed. Then, less certainly: “Isn’t it?”

I kept reaching into the dishwasher. Glasses, mugs, silverware returned to their designated places—anything to prevent me from actually squirming with discomfort. “I don’t like to be asked questions. I don’t like having to talk about things I don’t want to talk about. I’d rather be alone than open myself up to be poked and prodded.”

Thomas, Sherry. “The One in My Heart.” 

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

My tauke & part time job

Salam and hi :)

Usually during my semester break, I will be working a part time job. After my foundation year, I searched for a job at a small shop in the supermarket. And I got a job as a seller in this jewellery's shop which sells silvers, brooch, etc. I think I worked there for 5 months, before I got to pursue my degree on September. But after that, even during my semester break, the tauke will call me and asked me to work again haha. And our friendship right now like 4 years already and he got married during that and now I'm working with his wife, as he opened another shop at another supermarket.

People always say to me "Rajinnya kerja cuti-cuti macam ni". Well, I need money. I don't know about other people, but the way I raised, if you want something, then you should work for it. I would'nt asked for money to my parents unless I am really broke and in need of something. All of my siblings aware of the motto (lewls, if it can call a motto), well except our youngest brother perhaps.

Some people are so racist, because I worked with a chinese. And some customers too. There's a guy asked me "Tauke cina ke dik?" I nodded, hinted the sound of disapproved from his glance. Then he said, "Bukak kedai sendiri la dik,". If I followed my urges on that particular time, I would smash his face into bruises.

What's wrong with befriend or working with a person that have different race/religion than yours? What a sick mentality that certain Malaysians hold on to. My tauke & his wife are very kind and helpful to me, so much that sometimes I felt so embarrassed (because I'm not that good employee).

Now I help them during the fasting month, as it close to raya time, usually there are a lot of customers and they need an extra hand. Eunice always treat us for the break of fast, (berbuka/sungkai). And yes, she also treat us for lunch and breakfast if we can't fast, she's that generous :). Love her.

The essence of taking a part time job is, you learn a lot about people and it makes you humble doing the simple or ordinary job. And you didnt care about what other people think about you.

Eid Mubarak everyone.

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