I don't even know me

I remember watching a video in Youtube accidentally about an ending of a movie called "Paper Town". The scene where a girl shouted at the boy saying;

"How can you say you love me? I don't even know me." (sort of)

Which was, at that time I think that the script was utterly ridiculous.

Until now.

I was listening to this new song, Half a Man by Dean Lewis, and when it came to this lyrics..

..but how I am supposed to love you when I don't love who I am?

Oh, yes. I definitely can relate.

And yes, I don't even know me.

PBAKL 2019

It's been a long time since I went to PBAKL. The last one was in 2015, I think. During my university years. But this year suddenly the feelings to go to the Pesta Buku was overflowing. Maybe because of the fact that I decided to start writing again, as I had been before. And maybe because, it's also been a while since I bought books anything in BM. (Indonesian language excluded).

I want to be able to write again. I miss that feeling. Whenever I read my old writings, sometimes I feel like I don't recognize the person who wrote it anymore. My vocab sucks. I don't even wrote any poetry anymore. Now, I'm starting to. Oh God, yes, it was horrible.

My budget for PBAKL was like RM100 maximum, and end up my money was flying to RM200 lol. I bought poetry books from Benderung Indie booth, Ilhambooks and ITBM. The malay novels are also from ITBM, Dubook and other indie publishers. Usually I only bought from the authors that I'm familiar with, but now I decided to give other new names a try, based on the recommendations of the book assistant there.

Now I can't wait to finish all the books, and make a review too.

Don't Limit Yourself

As I was still grappling with my unknown interest, this tweet give me a reassurance.

The beautiful thing about the not knowing is that, the journey of searching for it. I will not limit myself, again. I'm not scared of the unknown either.